We look at God as this supreme-being sitting up in Heaven on a marble throne with a sack full of lightning bolts with one at the ready just in case someone dares to do wrong.
Where do we get this idea that we are being punished for a mistake? Where do we get this idea that He will take a child from us because we did something wrong? What a shameful thing to teach and a horrible thing to believe. God is the God of love. The LAST resort would be for Him to punish us. Any place you look in the Bible about Jesus’ time on earth He fought for our cause with God. He used a prostitute, a whore, a prideful king, a thief, a murderer, a liar and the list goes on. There were consequences to their actions but it was a last resort to do something as a capital punishment. God created us. Don’t you think He is smart enough to know what He got Himself into? He knew what He was undertaking when He decided to make man. Nothing that happens in our lives is a surprise to God. If you want to know why, ask! Are you afraid of the answer? You never know, you may get one.
Some things I have seen, like losing a child at a very young age or babies undergoing heart surgery, etc. I don’t get it. I don’t have to understand, I just need to trust. Since I have gone through some unexplained craziness in my world, I have been a more compassionate and understanding person. Did I enjoy going through those things? Absolutely not! Am I glad I did now? YES!! I am so glad I have allowed the hard stuff in my life to change me into a softer person. I am a fighter, and may wear armor, but my heart is soft. I may shoot fire from my eyes, but if you look closely there is always a tear at the edges. I may come down with a “hard hand” but my arms are always open for a hug. My back may be stiff, braced for what is to come and my feet ready to run into the battle, but my shoulder is also open for someone to cry on them. Each time my heart has been broken it has mended even stronger than it was before. Each time I have cried tears of hurt, tears of joy weren't far behind.
I asked God why and He gave me my answer. I looked around me, at what used to be my life, and realized He gave me reinforcements long before I needed them. He gave me two strong little people who have been my constant and I have been theirs. When others came in and out of their lives as if it were nothing, we were always together. They have asked the questions I didn't think of and forgave with grace that has shamed me. They have been my backup dancers and singers as we flatfooted to bluegrass music in the kitchen.They have been my hide and seek partners. They have held my hand as we walked into the church alone. They have been my movie buddies and ice cream thieves. They have read my stories before anyone else and thought I was amazing because I could write. We have been study buddies and princesses on parade. We have been stealth fighters and hunting pros. We have read hours of stories and have created our own. We have decided that our future is what we make of it. We aren’t allowed to sit around and think of what was or what should have been. We think about what is. If we don’t like how things are then we change them. We decided that anything that comes into our lives will make us stronger. No one person will have the power to determine how our life turns out other than ourselves. We are overcomers, fighters, loving people that cannot wait for each and every day because we have reinforcements.
I do not believe it is a bad thing to ask God the "why" of things. He position, power or intent isn't threatened. He knows how we are and what we lack. He isn't surprised at any of it. Sometimes, saying "God is in control." isn't enough. Sometimes, we need answers of questions we don't even know how to form. I love that He knows what I need, even when I don't. Ask. Look for the answer. Just never forget that God's love reaches through our questions and doubts and when we come to terms with what it happening in our lives, He will already be there.
*This is a little preview out of the book I have been writing. I hope and pray that you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.
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